The strange poetry of search engines


WordPress stats allow me to view the search terms that people use to find my blog. Here are the best ones of the last four months, in no particular order-

rat poison

young annie dillard

kill all rapists

pink meth


the virgin mary

butch privilege

kill all the rapists it’s fun

lesbian truck drivers porn

I want to kill rapists

spiders that jump

chocolates raining

where to buy acorn flour

kill your rapist

whole body feels like static

im not afraid

I’m not afraid of winter

garage spider

crying virgin mary

rapist vigilante

darkness is terrible lightness is happiness

kill rapists

is it ok to kill rapist

glowing mother mary

sockless english girls in winter

enchanted valley hike

perfect tits

I am not afraid of rain and cold

homemade cellphone I masturbate outside

sometimes I like to lay on the floor and pretend I am a carrot

dark creepy sky

solitude in rain falls


kill your rapist shirt

playing scrabble by lamplight

will sodium nitrate kill scabies

Yuma battle of bands, the grapes of wrath

virgin mary hair

kill your rapist

mattress decomposing

I want to slaughter rapists

good cowboys are packed like a can of biscuits

clouds on ground people in air

vigilante kills rapist

I’m barefoot

how to kill rapists

fuck western medicine

the eyes of virgin mary

decorate wall with paper and cornstarch

rapist must be killed

whittled wood pipes

who’s afraid of winter with this suit?

what to be scared of on the pacific crest trail

deserts to find crystal rocks

clementines solstice

scary clouds drawn

petition kill rapists

rapist shot and killed

is it ok to kill rapists

is it morally acceptable to shoot a rapist

I want to kill my rapist

why I have a lightness feeling in breathing in winter

garden spider, lightning bug

sad country songs about not getting a job

butch lesbians fucking and going wild

melting icicles quotes

I’ve been feeling painfully nostalgic lately

is it healthy to fuck yourself with a carrot

tater tots and ramen

winco brownie mix spruced up

kitten named after Greta Garbo

carrot ramen quinn

fat rockabilly butch lesbians

what does estrogen feel like

would you kill your rapist

how to make flour from birch bark

fuck Kerouac

butch lesbians have male privilege

vomit cartons

sleeping alone in the woods

killed his rapist

bust you out of the city

vagina tater

baking soda made my eyeglass lenses worse

binge dried cranberries

do guys ever kill rapists

This list tells me several things- that my dream about pink meth was kind of psychic because it really exists, that “ramen” is, of course, the perfect middle name for me, and that google likes me, because I am strange.

Also, to all the googlers with the question- the answer is yes. Just don’t get caught.

virgin mary

The Virgin Mary wants you to kill your rapist

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