rememberies, return, freedom, the long tail end of wintertime

Oh, internet! Sweet internet! It’s been so long, so much has happened, and none of it has been documented. There hasn’t been any time for that. But a few things have changed, now. They are-

-I just got a 16 thousand dollar settlement from the city of DC from a class action lawsuit from when I was arrested with a group of 400 people at a protest in 2002 against the IMF

-And so I am taking a year off of school to write.

A year! To write! I will write a thing and it might be something terrible, it might be something worthless, it might be something wonderful, but it will be long, and it will feel pleasurable to write it.

But it will not, unfortunately, be blog posts. I might post here sometimes! I do not know. It is nice to forget about the internet, to forget about facebook, to forget about blogs. Where I’m currently living the internet is only accessible via DSL cable in one awkward corner of the kitchen, and one is forced to sit in an uncomfortable chair. I’m moving into an apartment by myself (tiny house! tiny house! TINY HOUSE!) but I hope that in my new place the internet is just as difficult. It is nice to be free from it- my attention span lengthens, I am able to read entire novels.

It is the long tail end of wintertime, now, the hardest part, the final stretch that makes you want to quit, only there is nothing left to quit. And looking through my archives, I happened upon this piece I wrote when it was never-get-dark-summertime in Alaska, and I was also having a hard time. The piece is real personal and so I password protected it when I wrote it, but now I have un-password protected it, and so if you haven’t read it, now you can. I wrote this piece about the single hardest moment of that entire year, for me. Re-reading this piece I am reminded of how hard times come, and they stay, and time stops, but then, inexplicably, they go. And I am not going to say that remembering that makes me feel better, because it doesn’t. But remembering distracts me, and time passes, and maybe tomorrow, well, who knows.


6 thoughts on “rememberies, return, freedom, the long tail end of wintertime

  1. Carrot! [I hope I can call you that, because it is terribly cute.]
    I am so excited for you! Please make this year fabulous, although I know you will. Can’t wait until you publish something, so I can purchase and tell everyone that I read your things before they did!

    Lots of queer love,

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